Today, we are discussing Mocktails and alcohol-free beverages and how this helps or hinders people with Alcoholism. I know many people have different views on this topic, and remember this is only my opinion and recovery.
Everyone has their own story, and we are accepting of everyone’s opinion and going back to 2010, in yet another attempt to quit drinking. I gave up drinking for maybe six months, using some medication from my GP for a home detox, and drinking Alcohol-free beers and wine (but realistically, it may have been more like 4 or 5, I was very vague with the truth back then). I specifically remember that my biggest fear back then was not drinking out of a wine glass. Even if I had a glass of water, I would ask for it to be passed to me in A wine glass.
Friends and family would ask me why? to make me feel grown-up, I would say. It is clear to me today, looking back, that I was holding on to anything that reminded me of drinking alcohol. I was not ready to let go. I would still go to the pubs and clubs with my friends and drink my Becks Blue. This was a beer advertised in the UK as alcohol-free, containing less than 0.05%.
Even though it is nearly impossible to get drunk drinking this, it can be a potent trigger. I drank bottles of it. This alcoholic found that 0.05% of alcohol and wanted more and more. The irony in this also is that the alcohol-free beers and wines would cost almost double the bottles’ price, which contained 100% alcohol. You can’t beat ripping someone off, which is suffering, can you!
I was due to go on holiday to turkey with my family, and it was an all-inclusive package.
The total price included all food and drink. These were my favourite types of vacations. BUT I AM NOT DRINKING argh. So I look into being able to send enough Becks blue to get me through 2 weeks in turkey. Have you ever heard of such insanity? I wasn’t dealing with my Alcoholism. I was covering it. It was not clear to me then, but I was heading for a relapse. When we got to Turkey, I started drinking lemonade, and I got them to put a little splash of lager in my lemonade, and before the holiday was over, I was having a little splash of lemonade in a pint of lager. Since getting sober in March 2012, I have only indulged in an alcohol-free beer once, and I was on a works Christmas party in 2014.
One of my clients and all of the staff, they were not aware I was in recovery and was not drinking, so many times people asked me if I wanted a drink, I kept explaining that I was driving, a couple of them said, you can still have 1, Already had that at home I replied quickly back. Someone brought me an alcohol-free beer! It was not a beck blue. It was something else I can not remember now. I started to drink it. Even just holding the cold bottle in my hand took me back, back to me drinking. I started dancing, standing on the balcony looking over at the dance floor holding my bottle of beer.
It may as well been a full Corona or Carlsberg. I was beginning to feel how alcohol made me think, and then I felt a hot flush, and I started sweating. I knew I wanted more, and I knew that my alcoholic body had once again found that 0.05%, and it was reminding me what my life could be once more. I made my excuses and left. My head was in a mess,
So from that moment on, I knew it was not worth sacrificing my sobriety over. Why would I want to taste something that tastes the same as alcohol when I know all the trouble it caused me, my family and my friends, to be recalled of all that pain again. These days I drink Mocktails and not because I miss cocktails but to generally feel like a grown-up, and this time when I say it, I know that I am genuine. It is nice to have a special drink when you go out, instead of holding a lemonade in a child’s glass. Of course, the other massive difference here is that I have worked on my Alcoholism, and I don’t look for things to remind me of it. I rarely miss it.