Well as much as holidays are about fun it’s also about survival and staying sober.
I’m a single mum of one 5 year old boy. I consider myself very lucky as he is a really well behaved and considerate boy. Although, he is still a 5 year old and has his moments, to be expected.
This was our first holiday together just one on one since I have been in recovery, 3 and a bit years. We were on island so most of the time the vibe was party central.
A couple of things I observed were; I was pretty much the only single parent on the island. I was one of the only non drinking parents on the island. Alcohol was absolutely everywhere and offered to me at every turn. Those points alone proved an interesting trip.
Memories
I found that I had huge memories flooding back at the sight of a wine bottle label, it was the one I was drinking at my rock bottom. This really shook me, not to drink or use but it was more the huge emotion that was attached to it.
Shame, guilt, remorse, fear and sadness. Thankfully I have a twelve step program in my life, so I paused, said the serenity prayer out loud. I did some breathing and promptly removed the alcohol from the minibar to the top cupboard so it was out of my face!!
I spoke to my sponsor about it which helped allot, bringing it into perspective as I can be dramatic about things. A true addict! Then for the rest of the holiday I just said no thank you I don’t drink a thousand times. We kept away from the real boozing scene. The other part was wrangling a kid on my own, sober and clean. Keeping my cool when there is no escape, nothing to dull or numb with at the end or the beginning of the day is tough.
Keep it on a tight leash
My addict brain needs to be kept on a tight leash – through prayer, meditation, inventory and meetings. Keeping all that up while I was away has been so important. I love going away but I love coming home even more – safe, secure, alcohol and drug free zone in my home and a routine.
Self-compassion, grounding and mindfulness have been HUGE to aid my recovery. One of my favorite teachers is Dr. Kristin Neff – check out her website Self-Compassion Exercises by Dr. Kristin Neff. Staying sober is not just a once off thing – it’s a daily practice.
Being on holidays, sober with children is tough. From one recovered addict, keep it up – sobriety is worth all the hard work.
Here is the link to our services Our Services | Alcohol Addiction Treatments – The Freedom Room
To spend this time with my son is truly a gift. Love Camilla xx